A Pain in the Side
by Pirate Moose
Summary: Gwen Cooper isn't feeling very well yet, still determined to prove her place within the team, she heads out to investigate a weevil sighting. However, what happens when things take a turn for the worse and she's all alone…?


**Title**: A Pain in the Side

**Summary**: Gwen Cooper isn't feeling very well yet, still determined to prove her place within the team, she heads out to investigate a weevil sighting. However, what happens when things take a turn for the worse and she's all alone…?

**Setting**: Some point after series 2 but before the Series That Never Happened.

**Pairings**: Jack/Ianto (very much so) and Gwen/Rhys

**Rating/Warning**: Adult rating due to strong suggestion of naughty stuff and innuendo. If you don't like that kind of thing, then please don't read.

**Disclaimer**: Still don't own Torchwood.

**Word Count**: 2,489

**A/N**: I actually wrote this over a year ago but have only just got round to uploading it. Hope you like :)

_…_

Damn alarm. Gwen scrambled across the tangle of bed sheets to silence its sarcastic drones as Rhys – in complete ignorance – merely turned over and continued snoring. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes and yawning loudly, Gwen swung her legs over the edge of the bed and felt for the soft wool of her slippers. They had been a Christmas present from her Mam; one of those gifts that sat at the bottom of the wardrobe gathering dust until said relative mentions them a few years later. Pink, fluffy bunnies and pom-poms were not Gwen's kind of thing but, though she hated to admit it, they were incredibly warm. She just prayed that Ianto – or, God forbid, Jack – would never see them.

Shrugging on her dressing gown, she manoeuvred around the furniture and padded towards the kitchen. A few minutes later, the kettle was happily boiling in its stand and the mugs beside it on the worktop. As Gwen reached up to get the jar of coffee from the cupboard, an unfamiliar pain sliced through her belly button. She let out a surprised yelp and, grabbing her stomach, let the jar slide to the ground, watching as it smashed into thousands of tiny pieces and sent a blizzard of coffee grains across the wood-cut floor. On hearing this, Rhys leapt out of bed and skidded around the door frame, completely oblivious as to his lack of underwear.

"Christ, Gwen!" He noticed that she looked unusually pale, a startling contrast to her raven dark hair, as she gripped the side of the breakfast bar. "Shit, love, are you all right?"

She flicked a stray piece of hair from out of her eyes and tucked it behind her ear. "Yeah, I… it was so weird. There was this sudden… pain. Like nothing I've ever felt before…"

Concern set into Rhys' face, his expression a contortion of worry and confusion. Within Torchwood, weird was the norm; so if _Gwen_ called something weird, then it must be bad. "Do you want me to call a doctor? Shall I call Jack; get you the day off…?"

"Oh no, no, no. It's gone now… at least, I think it has." The couple stood there for a minute, neither really knowing what to do or say next.

"Well, tell you what. Let me clean this up while you have a shower, and I'll make us some omelette á la Rhys."

"That would be wonderful." She reached up and gave him a soft kiss, careful to avoid treading on any broken glass. She just hoped it wasn't going to be one of those days.

~TWTWTW~

The Hub was filled with the timeless rhythm of Glenn Miller, crackling through the ancient gramophone sitting in Jack's office. The Rift had been suspiciously quiet for the past few days and Jack was starting to get bored. Ianto had already confiscated the tube of tennis balls to stop him teaching Myfanwy how to fetch; he did not wish to clear up the mess created when a flying dinosaur gets pelted with little yellow balls. This suit had only just been dry-cleaned, thank you very much.

There was a wheezing groan as the giant cog-wheeled door rolled to one side, allowing the pale, dark-haired woman to enter. Plonking herself down at her station, Gwen tucked her bag under the desk and automatically reached out for the steaming mug of coffee Ianto had just placed before her. "Ta, love."

"Gwen? Are you ok? You look like death warmed up."

She snorted in mock offence, "Charming."

"Ianto's right," called Jack hesitantly, making his way down the spiral staircase from his office. "You don't look too well."

"Nah, I'm fine. Really. I've just got this pain..." Gwen waved dismissively, "Look, it's nothing." She gave them a reassuring smile; though the uncertainty was obvious.

"Hey," shrugged Jack. "You chose to marry him…" He ducked as a stapler hurtled through the air and missed his ear by millimetres. He gave Gwen an apologetic grin.

"I've got a pain in the backside," Ianto deadpanned. "Have done for quite a while now. Though, on the bright side, it's tingling with 51st century pheromones and is _very_ handsome…"

"_Up _the backside, more like…."

Gwen held up her hands, "Oh god, _please_ don't go there! I have enough trouble keeping this omelette down as it is!" She swivelled round on her chair and picked up a freshly printed sheet. "Hmmm, possible Weevil sighting in the Millennium Stadium - I'll take this one." She started fanning herself with the now-folded sheet. "We really need some new air conditioning down here, Jack. It's boiling!"

"Err, Gwen, the air conditioning works fine. I think you're just feeling flushed from the thought of the lovely Welsh rugby lads warming up on the pitch." He winked at her, "I know I'd be!"

"It's a tough job, but someone's got to do it!" She gulped down the last of her coffee and grabbed her handbag. "Now, go and do something fun while I'm out. Not too naughty though, mind!" She waggled a playful finger at the both of them, "You got that?"

Jack beamed, "Gwen, really? Would you expect anything less?"

The stapler hit him square at the back of the head. Only this time, it had been thrown by Ianto, whose burning pink cheeks were clashing awfully with his red shirt…

Jack watched his young colleague as she retreated through the cog-door. She really did look terrible.

"Are you sure about this, Jack? I know Gwen can be stubborn, but it's going to lead her into _serious_ trouble one of these days."

Jack continued to stare at the door, though Gwen had long since left. "Gwen Cooper doesn't often take no for an answer," he slid a hand around Ianto's waist, "but she knows her limits. Bring the mobile along, so we can be there if she calls."

"Bring it along where?"

The Captain wiggled an eyebrow, "It would be a very bad thing to disobey a former policewoman now, wouldn't it?"

"Yes," Ianto agreed, after a mere second of contemplation, "I believe it would. As long as you don't think we should go with her-"

"Ianto, Gwen's a grown woman. If she says she can go it alone, then she can. We'll just stand by if she needs us."

"You do provide a persuasive argument," said Ianto, a little lopsided grin dancing across his face.

"That's not all I can provide…" He squeezed the young man's hand as they made towards his office, ascending the staircase three steps at a time…

~TWTWTW~

_Ohhh, jeez! _Keeping one hand on the steering wheel, Gwen grabbed her side. The pain seemed to have settled a bit, but then she drove over that damn, _stupid_ speed bump. _OWW!_

Pulling into the Stadium car park, Gwen switched off the ignition and sat quietly for a moment. Something wasn't quite right, but she didn't want to admit it. For some reason, she still felt the need to prove herself to Jack; to prove that she _belonged_ in the team. It was stupid, really. She was in _charge_ of the team during Jack's absence! She grabbed the Weevil-busting kit from the passenger seat and got out of the car. Having phoned ahead, she knew that the Stadium had been vacated. A shame really. Seeing some sweaty, muscular men would have been a welcome distraction from the moving pain in her belly…

With one hand grasping the handle of her gun and the other holding her PDA, Gwen heightened her senses; scouting the perimeter of the Stadium with sharp focus.

All clear.

As she went inside, the small pulsing dot on the PDA screen alerted her to a Weevil's presence, thankfully not too close yet. As per her training, Gwen kept close to the walls, her gun now sitting comfortably in her hand. Hoping this could be wrapped up quickly, she crept soundlessly along the concrete breezeblocks, one eye constantly on the small machinery in her palm.

It was suspiciously quiet. Then came another shot of pain.

Wincing and clutching her side, Gwen slid down the wall, trying to take deep breaths. The clatter of her gun as it slipped from her hand echoed in the vacated structure. The beeps of the PDA were getting dangerously close together; the dot ever-increasing in size. She needed to keep going and find somewhere out of sight. Struggling, Gwen hoisted herself up and walked a bit further on – seeing the Bar jutting out from the next corner, she carefully made her way over to it. Haste was a necessity in theory, but not in practice.

A distant growl sent a cold shiver down her spine, yet she could feel herself burning up again.

This _really _wasn't good.

Activating the comms in her ear, Gwen gave in to her resilience. "Jack," she whimpered, "I don't feel so good…"

Back in the Hub, Jack chewed at his bottom lip. It had to be something really bad for Gwen to admit defeat. Climbing out of his underground bedroom, he hastily fastened his shirt buttons and scooped his greatcoat off the desk. "It's all right Gwen. Hold on in there, and we'll come and get you." He nodded to Ianto, who followed suit and grabbed the SUV keys as they headed out of the office.

Jack drummed impatiently on the steering wheel and tutted loudly as the light remained stubbornly red. If Ianto hadn't been sitting beside him, he would have ignored the signal completely and driven straight into the oncoming line of cars, expecting them to move out of _his_ way. He could not, however, face another one of Ianto's road-safety talks.

"Com'on, com'on, COM'ON!"

"The electrical equipment can't hear you," Ianto sighed. For the sake of his own sanity, he hoped the lights would change soon.

"Gwen?" asked Jack, switching on the Bluetooth headset. "We're nearly there, okay?"

"…"

He tapped his ear and, with his forehead creased, glanced over to Ianto, "Has the system gone down?" His colleague tapped at the PDA in his hand and quickly shook his head.

"Nope, it's fine."

"Gwwwen…?"

"…"

"_GWEN! _Shit!" He snapped, his voice sharp with urgency. He flawed the accelerator before Ianto even had the chance to open his mouth.

~TWTWTW~

"_Gwen?_" said Jack over the comms. "_We're nearly there, okay?_"

"…"

"_Gwwwen…?"_

"…"

"_GWEN!_" Jack's voice snapped.

Every step she took brought on another ounce of pain. Gwen had taken a bullet to the side before, but that was nothing compared to how she was feeling right now. Sweat was beading on her brow as the fever swept over her; she could hear Jack shouting in her ear, but couldn't quite hone in on the voice. _Come on, Gwen,_ she thought to herself, _keep focused. Find cover until the boys get here. Go home. Have a couple of paracetamol. A nice bath. Then get into… owww! _It was too much; she sank to her knees clutching her side, her breaths short and sharp. Everything was starting to spin around her, her vision blurring. Out of the corner of her eye, Gwen saw a shadowy figure emerging from the ladies' toilets. _Oh shit…_ She scrambled for her gun, but remembered she had dropped it a few minutes ago.

Too late; the darkness fell on her like a ton of bricks. The last thing Gwen saw before she blacked out was the snarling, drooling face of the Weevil as it lunged towards her…

~TWTWTW~

Gwen's eyes flickered open. It took a moment or so for the room to stop spinning and for her brain to make sense of the random blobs of colour in her vision. They began to mould into a face… Rhys…

"She's coming round!" He cried and suddenly Jack and Ianto appeared next to him. The Captain's mega-watt grin was instantly recognisable, even to her state of semi-consciousness. Gwen tried to sit up but Rhys gently pushed her back down, bending over to gently kiss her forehead.

Whitewash walls that blended seamlessly into the ceiling, the – unfortunately – familiar daffodil curtains, and her pink over-night bag sitting on the bedside cabinet. Why was she in a hospital? Ohhh, there was a Weevil. No, but her stomach? Had she passed out before the Weevil got to her? She couldn't remember…

Obviously seeing the confusion settle into her pale features, Jack offered an explanation, "I'd take it real easy if I were you. You've just had your appendix taken ou-"

"WHAT?"

"I thought you looked ill this morning, sweetheart. I didn't realise it was this bad." Rhys held her hand. "It's just lucky they got you here in time, or it could have been a lot worse…"

"Actually," said Ianto, "it would have been a lot worse if the Weevil had got to you before we did."

"Oh. Er, yeah, what happened with that?"

"Well, Ianto and I _finally_ made it to the Stadium…"

"By breaking all the rules of the Highway Code."

Jack rolled his eyes, "Not _all_ the rules."

"A very large number of th-"

"Look, whose telling the story here? The point is, you weren't responding over the comms, I was worried, and may… _may_… have endangered a few lives on the way to find you. We managed to track you both down, but thought we were too late when we found the Weevil crouching over you. Ianto here – always a stunner – tasered it and we bought you straight here."

"And I missed it all?"

"Yep!" He patted her hand. "Well, Mrs Williams, we'd best leave you to rest. We've got an angry Weevil to deal with. He's probably woken and torn out the inside of the SUV by now..." Beside him, Ianto whimpered slightly at the thought of the damaged upholstery.

"Hey, thanks for helping me, guys. Really. I guess I'll see you on Monday?"

"Oh, no. Not for another two weeks. Doctor's orders."

"Ohhh, no way! What am I supposed to do for a fortnight? I can't leave you two alone for two seconds, let allow weeks!"

Jack smiled and held Ianto's hand, "Oh she of little faith! We'll be fine. You just concentrate on getting better!"

Gwen reluctantly nodded; she could see this was a one-sided argument. Besides, a little time off wouldn't be so bad…

They stayed for a bit longer before eventually saying their goodbyes. Rhys perched on the side of the bed – careful not to jiggle it too much – relaxing now that Gwen had a bit more colour in her cheeks.

The ward was eerily quiet until Jack popped his head around the doorway, "Oh, and Gwen? Love the slippers, by the way." He was grinning from ear to ear. "Remind me to buy you a matching pair of pyjamas for Christmas!"

A pair of fluffy, pink rabbits sailed through the air towards him. He managed to duck just in time.

It was Ianto who got a mouthful of pom-pom.

_~ fin ~_


End file.
